Irrelevant Offensive Questions Not to ask Transgender People - Post #42

 Irrelevant Offensive Questions Not to ask Transgender People

For those people who would like to be supportive, but are not sure what to ask and not ask Transgender people, this post has a few pointers.  First thing to remember, regardless of how long a person may be transitioning, we are people to and have feelings.  Transitioning can be very scary and very challenging.  So, being asked irrelevant offensive questions can contribute to our stress and be very hurtful.  With this in mind, try to remember, never ask questions to transgender people that you would never ask non-transgender (cis-gender) people.  Here are some questions that I do not recommend asking transgender people...unless you are close friends and have permission to do so:

-  Never ask a transgender person what body parts they have.  If you would not like someone asking that to one of your family members, then do not ask us.  Besides, physical biology sex is different that neuro-biology gender, which is why we are transgender in the first place.

- Never ask a transgender person their sexual orientation.  Nor should you assume that a transgender person is homosexual.  Like physical Biology, sexual orientation is different than gender.  As a male to female transgender person, I have been harassed by many men and even some family members assuming that I am now into men, which is not true.  Assume nothing with Transgender People. 

- You have never been Transgender before, why are you now?  First, transgender people have always been transgender, but many of us are scared to live as their authentic selves.  Because of stigmas, social pressure, and knowing that I will be discriminated by some friends and family, it took me about 48 years to decide to transition. 

- Why are you transgender, God does not make mistakes?  Without getting into a Biblical debate or possibly offending some believers, Transgender believers do not believe God makes mistakes either.  We ALL are created different, but still made in His image.  Like other birth abnormalities, why is it not okay for us to be medically treated when other abnormalities can be treated?  Please do not demonize us just because you do not understand the diversity in God's creations. 

- Do not ask a Transgender Person how they have sex.  Like other points, if you would not ask this question to other people and would not like your family members being asked that, do not ask us.  It is only our spouses or partners business, not yours. 

- Do not discriminate, like: How can you be a woman if you cannot have children?  Does this standard apply to non-transgender females?  There are a lot of women who cannot have children, are they not still females?

These are just some of the most common questions we face as transgender people.  We realize that many people do not understand the science of transgender, but all we ask is that others be considerate when asking questions.  I recommend if you want to learn and would like to ask a question to one of us, just be respectful and ask for permission.  Most of is willing to share their story and would like others to be more educated on the topic... we just ask to be treated with respect.

It is my hope and prayer that this post will help teach awareness to those who are interested.  Maybe in time, society will learn to treat us as people, not demonize, pervert, or exploit us.  If anyone has any respectful questions, I would be happy to try to help.

Thank you for taking your time to read this post.

Respectfully - Jade

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